Look up "anxiety" in any dictionary (or many if you look online) and you'll find lots of synonyms, some pretty obvious, but my favorite is "disquiet". That's exactly what I feel like today. Things just feel .. I dunno.. off. Got that knot in the pit of my stomach for no particular reason feeling going on. It's kind of a useless feeling, at least in my case. More likely that I'll just freeze up like a rabbit waiting to be scooped up by a hawk rather than do anything terribly useful.
Maybe it's because the weather can't make up its mind. Woke up to a gorgeous sunny crisp fall day.. now it's getting cloudy and dark. Better stay dry for the baseball game! Constantly changing temperatures tend to be rough on my knees and hips too. So I'm physically not feeling the best. Maybe it's just reaction to changes in Kevin's life.. concerns that both people involved will be able to handle the changes with strength and grace. And of course, it could always be related to the suckitude level of the past few years. Who knows.
Going to do my best to basically just wait it out, this disquietude that I'm feeling. Maybe do a little more tidying. Maybe bring my new unicorn statue in from the porch and decide his permanent home in the yard. I'll have Kevin home with me to watch the games... that will be nice.
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